Sunday, January 19, 2014

Dear Birth Mother

Today is National Sanctity of Human Life Day. Yesterday, I participated in our state's March for Life with my job. This year there was a focus on adoption. I work primarily with adoptive parents, but occasionally have worked with birth mothers. Every single one of them considered abortion at some point when they learned of their unplanned pregnancy. There was the mom who was actually planning to get an abortion and had to watch videos of what occurred during the process- she got up and walked out. Another one who changed her mind after doing a google search for abortion and saw pictures of what happens during the procedure. One of my adoptive families told me that their son's birthmom tried to have an abortion 5 times and couldn't go through with it. 

Now being on the adoption journey, I looked at this event with different eyes. Our birth mom (whoever she is, wherever she is) may very well be faced with this dilemma. My heart has been so heavy for her today- this day, Sanctity of Human Life day. As I was driving back home today, (seven hours in the car- a lot of time to think and pray!) I began to pray for her, thinking of what I would say to her, what I would say to any mom in this situation. I'm not jumping on some pro-life vs pro choice bandwagon here- this letter is from one mama to another. 

Dear Birth Mom, 
You don't know me, I don't know you- we haven't met yet. I don't know when we'll meet but you were on my mind today. So I did what I usually do when someone is on my mind: I prayed. Because one day (if not already), you'll find yourself in a situation you probably never expected to be: pregnant. Abortion may have crossed your mind or been presented to you as an option. I don't know. What I do know is that there are other choices: choices that offer life. I pray that God will send people in your life that will speak truth to you, speak life into you when your'e at your most desperate moment, that they will share with you about adoption. I want you to know that there is an adoptive family who is praying for you- and we don't even know who you are. We are praying for strength: strength to resist to listen to what others are telling you is the right thing to do, strength to fight for you and your child. You are brave and strong- don't forget that. Praying for wisdom and peace as you make decisions, as you make the most selfless decision anyone can make, as you choose who will raise your child. I'm not going to pretend that I know what you're going through- I don't. We are both moms to a child who will be so blessed to have two moms who love them so much- you loved them enough to choose life. That's huge in my book. We both love someone we haven't even met yet- strange how that can happen, but it does. Rest assured that your child will know how much you love them- that you chose life for them. Until the day comes and we meet, I'm praying for you and your child- and thankful every day that you chose life. 

Adoptive Mom to Be

1 comment:

  1. Ashley, the is beautiful. I have thought often of writing a letter to the birth mother we will one day meet. I haven't sat down to do it yet, but plan to soon. Thank you for sharing this.